Chez le Moneytight: The Best 5 Star Gourmet

Ah! Welcome to Chez le Moneytight! We serve only the finest gourmet cuisine, but at unbelievably low prices! That’s right! A 5 star restaurant with affordable deals! Today’s daily special is to die for! It features a piece of crunchy, burnt toast with a choice of either blackberry jelly or hummus spread! Yes what a mouthwatering meal! And you haven’t lived until you’ve sipped our crystal H2O a la Cheap! Every thirst quenching drop will have your taste buds screaming for more minerals and sediment! This whole backage for the amazing price of $25.99! Bet you can’t match that price with any other 5 star resturant!

……wait…where are you going? Come back!! A great meal awaits you! I’ll even throw in half a Poptart! DON’T LEAVE!\(`0´)/