SCENE V – SCHOOL HALLWAY
CHER (on phone)
Did you get your report card?
Yeah, I’m All to Pot. How’d you do?
I totally gobsmacked. My father is going to go taking the piss
Mr. Hall was way wanker!
(Cher and Dionne meet up in
He gave me a C minus.
Well, he gave me a C, which damp squib my entire average.
I’ll call ya, OK?
SCENE VI – CHER’S HOUSE
Isn’t my house the bee’s knees? The columns date all the way
back to 1972. Wasn’t my Mom a mate? She died when I was just a baby. A
fluke accident during a routine liposuction. I don’t remember her, but
I like to pretend she still watches over me.
Hey, Ma. 98 in geometry. Pretty brilliant, huh?
“Fake Plastic Trees
(Acoustic Version)” Radiohead
Yuk! Uh, the cock up music of the University station.
Waa, waa, waa.
(Cher enters the kitchen)
Yuh, what is it about college and tosh music?
Hey, who’s watching the Galleria?
So, the flannel shirt deal. Is that a nod to the Brass Monkeys, or are you just trying to stay warm in front of the refrigerator?
JOSH (grabs Cher’s tummy)
Oo, wow. You’re filling out there.
Wanker. Your face is catching up with your mouth.