Star Wars Joins Instagram With A Apple Inc. Selfie

Vader/JarJar selfie

Star Wars, the franchise that Disney will be continuing to produce from long, long ago, is moving into the digital self-absorption age. Mr. Darth Vader, a spokesperson of the Empire, said recently, “Now I can use social media to learn what the rebels are up to. Who needs to waste energy on The Force? I need all I got just to breath!” [note: “The Force” is considered to be a mythical projection of thought that causes action at a distance. Modern technology accomplishes the effect with network interfaces, demonstrating the falsehood of such ancient myths.] In addition, Mr. Vader explained that he might release a self-portrait in an effort to stop the Rebel Alliance by his visage.

Rebel General Jar-Jar Binks, posing in a self-portrait, said, “Yep, you right! Apple issa maker of iPads, I tink. And Instagram will maka da picture nice.” He went on to describe the fun that his Army buddies have sharing pictures of themselves on the battlefields of various planets.

In related news, Apple Inc. has officially changed their corporate identity to A Apple Inc. This move is thought to ensure that they appear first alphabetically, especially in any list that contains the name of their archenemies M Microsoft Inc. and S Samsung Inc. Always trendsetters, A Apple Inc leads the way in letterification embellishment of corporate identities.

For further updates, as they occur, check in with our partner website www.nsa.gov. Simply provide the information they seek, and the Empire will endure. The original tweet for this story occured at https://twitter.com/TwoHeadlines/status/407970369447161856, which as been archived at our partner’s ds106 Universal Data Center.

Image of Messers Vader and Binks can be found at http://flic.kr/p/i7wWiG