Your Daily Ritual

You have just returned from a visit to your landlord—the solitary neighbor you shall be troubled with. Day in and day out, you fume in rush hour traffic while you cuddle your espresso instead of your kids. You stare at the ceiling and think for a moment. It gives you an amazing amount of energy, like cocaine, if cocaine were really good for your digestion and didn’t ruin lives. This also makes you less likely to have sex on the first date, which is, generally speaking, another bad plan.